Inclusive Success, and the
Relationship to the Quiet Ego
Perry Douglas,
December 26, 2019
In psychologist Daniel Kahneman’s Nobel prize-winning book, Thinking, Fast and Slow, two modes of thought are analyzed: “System 1” which is fast, instinctive and emotional; and “System 2” which is slow, deliberative, and logical. Kahneman examines emotional versus logical thought processes. This book literally changed the way I think. It taught me how to quiet my emotions, ego, and intuition, and allowed the more deliberative part of my brain to play a greater and more effective role; thus relying less on intuition and ego, and more on information analysis and logic in ‘decisioning.’
Although we cannot completely suppress our emotions basic instincts, we do possess the cognition
and mindfulness to make our own choices. Adapting and combining thinking fast and slow, with quieting the ego, has allowed me to align, more effectively, my business objectives with my social objectives, resulting in a more balanced and satisfying pursuit of “success.” Setting goals, putting process first, and being inclusive with others, allows for an organic manifestation of personal and community goals, through a common purpose and pursuit.
In his groundbreaking and award-winning book, “the lemonade life,” author, Zack Freidman, explained how to fuel success, create happiness, and conquer anything. His research found that authenticity, honesty, and compassion are critical factors in achieving extraordinary long-term
success. Inspiring action in others is one of the most efficient and effective ways of achieving your own business objectives. It’s “less about [the] business and more about living your life with purpose, on your terms” that matters most in achieving greatness, he explains. Author, David Epstein’s book, Range; Why Generalists Triumph in a Specialized World, posits that more complex and unpredictable generalists excel because-they are masters of juggling interests beyond their own. Epstein points out that these individuals are more creative, more agile, and able to make “connections [with] their more
specialized peers.” Epstein’s book Range makes a compelling case in my view, for cultivating efficiencies that optimize self and business growth simultaneously.
A recent article by Barry Kaufman in Scientific American, “the Pressing Need for Everyone to Quiet Their Egos,” sums things up by explaining how through quieting the ego one can strengthen one’s best self and lead to meaningful and sustainable success. The quieter the ego becomes, increases the likelihood the logical part of your brain can be heard. According to Kaufman, the ego-driven approach to self-enhancement can actually get in the way of achieving one’s goals. One can spend so much time focused on what they want; they can alienate other individuals who are relevant and critical to their own individual success. The noisy ego can spend so much time defending itself, it forgets that relationships with others are what actually anchors their own success; or as stated by Kaufman, “it often inhibits the very goals it is most striving for.”
In business, I’ve found that the more I practice the approach of quieting my own ego, thinking slower, and balancing the interests of myself and others; growth is better cultivated. Focus more on self-awareness, interdependent identity, and the compassionate experience of those around me gets me the best results. In short, cognitive and proactive responses to the needs and desires of those on your team motivates them more to buy in and become fully invested in your own vision.
A quiet ego allows you to live a full existence and play the long game. It is associated with humility, flexibility in critical thinking, remaining openminded, and developing energy through passion and emotional intelligence. It also makes risk-taking easier, more thought-out and inclusive, with an
elevated sense of common purpose. Business ideas and concepts become clear and meaningful, with a sense of ownership for everyone involved. Quieting the ego is very conducive to living a big life! Kaufman’s work also demonstrated that the quiet ego is related to a genuine concern for the growth and development of self and others. As a person who’s achieved success at high-level team sports, I know that a united team, where everyone’s interest is aligned and supportive of one other, is a major component of winning. The “business-team” is fundamentally no different.
Accordingly, the human condition equally craves inclusion and belonging to a group. The inclusive success approach is driven through leadership, authenticity, mastery, positive social relationships and compassion.
Kaufman’s research found that self-sacrificing self-enhancement triggers positive reactions from others, and fostered stronger relationships for a more productive and prosperous enterprise. The human condition seeks and appreciates genuine authenticity, which is always quantifiably rewarded by society. Kaufman highlighted the “centrality of growth and balance values to the quiet ego construct”, and made clear that quieting the ego does not quiet the self. Instead, the quieter the ego, the stronger one's best self emerges.
Therefore, the hype around the “great” achieving individual business leader is not supported by the research; contrary to popular belief, although leaders receive individual accolades, it’s their teams that actually make things happen. Henceforth, it is my aspiration to try and achieve my own personal greatness, but, in the context of inclusivity. Practicing to maintain a strong balance between one’s objectives, while being mindful to the concerns and aspirations of others, can contribute significantly to individual high performance and creativity. Conversely, a narrow focus on self, not only deprives you of your true potential, it also deprives you of a broader, more effective strategic approach, which can achieve more for the whole.
Individuals with varying degrees of specialization, working together for a common purpose are significantly more productive than individuals working in silos. It is counter-intuitive and narrow-minded to believe that one can solve “complex- problems” alone, with singular solutions or approaches. The quiet ego leader leverages individuality, fosters and solidifies relationships, like spokes in a wheel, supportive of the velocity of the roll; strategically extracting the power of the best of the human condition in order to achieve the bigger vision. Changing lives and the world in the process should be what genuine leadership aspires to do.
Managing and quieting the noisy ego is the most optimal way of becoming wildly successful, and also giving you the additional personal satisfaction of knowing you may have changed people’s lives. This may mean, “sacrificing” and getting less economically, but still receiving a lot more in the end. Besides, as ‘they’ say…if you try to do it all yourself, you may end up with 100% of a million
dollars; but would you not rather 25% of $100 million dollars?
Perry Douglas,
Entrepreneur, Innovator and
Believer in Social Responsibility, and the
Good in Progressive Capitalism
Relationship to the Quiet Ego
Perry Douglas,
December 26, 2019
In psychologist Daniel Kahneman’s Nobel prize-winning book, Thinking, Fast and Slow, two modes of thought are analyzed: “System 1” which is fast, instinctive and emotional; and “System 2” which is slow, deliberative, and logical. Kahneman examines emotional versus logical thought processes. This book literally changed the way I think. It taught me how to quiet my emotions, ego, and intuition, and allowed the more deliberative part of my brain to play a greater and more effective role; thus relying less on intuition and ego, and more on information analysis and logic in ‘decisioning.’
Although we cannot completely suppress our emotions basic instincts, we do possess the cognition
and mindfulness to make our own choices. Adapting and combining thinking fast and slow, with quieting the ego, has allowed me to align, more effectively, my business objectives with my social objectives, resulting in a more balanced and satisfying pursuit of “success.” Setting goals, putting process first, and being inclusive with others, allows for an organic manifestation of personal and community goals, through a common purpose and pursuit.
In his groundbreaking and award-winning book, “the lemonade life,” author, Zack Freidman, explained how to fuel success, create happiness, and conquer anything. His research found that authenticity, honesty, and compassion are critical factors in achieving extraordinary long-term
success. Inspiring action in others is one of the most efficient and effective ways of achieving your own business objectives. It’s “less about [the] business and more about living your life with purpose, on your terms” that matters most in achieving greatness, he explains. Author, David Epstein’s book, Range; Why Generalists Triumph in a Specialized World, posits that more complex and unpredictable generalists excel because-they are masters of juggling interests beyond their own. Epstein points out that these individuals are more creative, more agile, and able to make “connections [with] their more
specialized peers.” Epstein’s book Range makes a compelling case in my view, for cultivating efficiencies that optimize self and business growth simultaneously.
A recent article by Barry Kaufman in Scientific American, “the Pressing Need for Everyone to Quiet Their Egos,” sums things up by explaining how through quieting the ego one can strengthen one’s best self and lead to meaningful and sustainable success. The quieter the ego becomes, increases the likelihood the logical part of your brain can be heard. According to Kaufman, the ego-driven approach to self-enhancement can actually get in the way of achieving one’s goals. One can spend so much time focused on what they want; they can alienate other individuals who are relevant and critical to their own individual success. The noisy ego can spend so much time defending itself, it forgets that relationships with others are what actually anchors their own success; or as stated by Kaufman, “it often inhibits the very goals it is most striving for.”
In business, I’ve found that the more I practice the approach of quieting my own ego, thinking slower, and balancing the interests of myself and others; growth is better cultivated. Focus more on self-awareness, interdependent identity, and the compassionate experience of those around me gets me the best results. In short, cognitive and proactive responses to the needs and desires of those on your team motivates them more to buy in and become fully invested in your own vision.
A quiet ego allows you to live a full existence and play the long game. It is associated with humility, flexibility in critical thinking, remaining openminded, and developing energy through passion and emotional intelligence. It also makes risk-taking easier, more thought-out and inclusive, with an
elevated sense of common purpose. Business ideas and concepts become clear and meaningful, with a sense of ownership for everyone involved. Quieting the ego is very conducive to living a big life! Kaufman’s work also demonstrated that the quiet ego is related to a genuine concern for the growth and development of self and others. As a person who’s achieved success at high-level team sports, I know that a united team, where everyone’s interest is aligned and supportive of one other, is a major component of winning. The “business-team” is fundamentally no different.
Accordingly, the human condition equally craves inclusion and belonging to a group. The inclusive success approach is driven through leadership, authenticity, mastery, positive social relationships and compassion.
Kaufman’s research found that self-sacrificing self-enhancement triggers positive reactions from others, and fostered stronger relationships for a more productive and prosperous enterprise. The human condition seeks and appreciates genuine authenticity, which is always quantifiably rewarded by society. Kaufman highlighted the “centrality of growth and balance values to the quiet ego construct”, and made clear that quieting the ego does not quiet the self. Instead, the quieter the ego, the stronger one's best self emerges.
Therefore, the hype around the “great” achieving individual business leader is not supported by the research; contrary to popular belief, although leaders receive individual accolades, it’s their teams that actually make things happen. Henceforth, it is my aspiration to try and achieve my own personal greatness, but, in the context of inclusivity. Practicing to maintain a strong balance between one’s objectives, while being mindful to the concerns and aspirations of others, can contribute significantly to individual high performance and creativity. Conversely, a narrow focus on self, not only deprives you of your true potential, it also deprives you of a broader, more effective strategic approach, which can achieve more for the whole.
Individuals with varying degrees of specialization, working together for a common purpose are significantly more productive than individuals working in silos. It is counter-intuitive and narrow-minded to believe that one can solve “complex- problems” alone, with singular solutions or approaches. The quiet ego leader leverages individuality, fosters and solidifies relationships, like spokes in a wheel, supportive of the velocity of the roll; strategically extracting the power of the best of the human condition in order to achieve the bigger vision. Changing lives and the world in the process should be what genuine leadership aspires to do.
Managing and quieting the noisy ego is the most optimal way of becoming wildly successful, and also giving you the additional personal satisfaction of knowing you may have changed people’s lives. This may mean, “sacrificing” and getting less economically, but still receiving a lot more in the end. Besides, as ‘they’ say…if you try to do it all yourself, you may end up with 100% of a million
dollars; but would you not rather 25% of $100 million dollars?
Perry Douglas,
Entrepreneur, Innovator and
Believer in Social Responsibility, and the
Good in Progressive Capitalism
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